Creating space in my business was just the first step. What came next was a deep, uncomfortable transformation. Here’s how I shifted from chasing growth for growth’s sake to aligning with my true priorities—and why it wasn’t as easy as I thought.
When I changed my business model, I thought the hardest part was just getting it all done.
There were so many moving parts—streamlining offers, simplifying systems, and focusing on creating space—that all I could think about was the work right in front of me. I just assumed that once the infrastructure was in place, everything would fall into place.
But when you’re charting new territory, you don’t always know what’s on the horizon. And last year, I learned that the work I thought was “the hardest part” was really just the beginning.
For the first time in a long time, I had an open schedule – a few commitments and a handful of monthly deliverables – and that was my first real opportunity to see whether I’d really integrated a lot of the things that led me to make these changes in the first place.
Just because you’ve laid the foundation for a more simplified and life-first business, doesn’t mean you’ve learned how to have a healthier, more aligned relationship with your work.
It’s only once the dust had really settled and everything was set up that I could see where I truly was.
And what I learned is that, yes, my values had shifted and I’d changed. But when faced with some of the things that caused me to overwork before, it was clear that there was more work to be done.
One of the biggest triggers for me was around money (if you haven’t read last Sunday’s issue, I kicked off this conversation there.
Even as I stepped into this new chapter, I couldn’t fully let go of the story that the former version of myself was somehow “more successful.”
I made so much more money
I had a bigger, more robust team
I had a ton of traction on social media and making daily sales there felt easy
But the truth about her?
She was overworked.
Her clients and her business got more from her than the people who loved her.
Her health and well-being were constantly on the back burner.
The only thing that that version of me had was more revenue.
This version of me:
- Doesn’t have social media as a constant tab open (it’s been almost a year since I went social media free).
- Has so much space in her schedule.
- Shows up fully as a mom and a wife.
- Has built incredible relationships and cultivated a vibrant local community.
- Is prioritizing health and taking steps to truly nourish herself.
At first, it felt like a tug-of-war between these two versions of myself: the ambitious, high-achieving me of the past and the reflective, intentional me of the present.
But here’s what I’ve learned:
That cognitive dissonance isn’t a sign of failure—it’s a sign of transformation.
When you’re evolving, your old self and your new self will inevitably clash. You’re leaving behind what’s familiar and stepping into something unknown. It’s uncomfortable, but it’s also necessary.
Over time, I’ve stopped seeing these versions of myself as opposing forces. They’re chapters in the same story, each with its own lessons and struggles, and both are vital to who I am today.
Last year, for example, I decided to open spots for private coaching. At the time, I convinced myself it was the perfect next move. I love this work, and I have so much to share and guide people through now that I’m on the other side since making the shift. And technically, I have the time…
But looking back, I can see where that decision came from. It wasn’t rooted in alignment—it was rooted in an old pattern of needing to fill my time with something productive. Years of conditioning had taught me that any time spent working needed to be maxed out with generating more revenue.
Even though I had created a business that supported my life, I still felt the pressure to find more ways to make money. I hadn’t fully unlearned the belief that growth for growth’s sake is always the goal.
Making more and more money isn’t the goal, at least not for me. Financially supporting myself in a way that allows me to live the life I want—that’s the goal.
So, I made the difficult decision to walk back my private coaching offer and not move forward with any applicants.
I know this was a privileged decision, but it was a choice I was fortunate to be able to make, so I seized it. And again, it’s that ability to choose that means so much to me.
If you’re a student of mine, you had a front row seat to me making this decision, I shared the behind the scenes of it in real time. But I wanted to share this publicly for many reasons.
Sometimes, we don’t commit to something because we’re afraid of what will happen if we change our minds. We’re afraid of being seen as flaky or feeling embarrassed because we’ve not followed through on something after making a big announcement. But I want to normalize that it’s okay to change your mind. It’s okay to realize something isn’t aligned and to walk away— and that isn’t the same as lacking integrity and not honoring your word.
Initially, when I had to break the news, I felt all of those things. But what I took from that situation is that seemingly hard decisions like that are a necessary step to break free from the cycle of overcommitting or keeping myself busy out of fear or because I’m chasing more to chase more.
Growth isn’t linear, and there were lots of back and forth moments like that last year, but the common thread is that they were all shifting me closer along the path and giving me glimpses of what it looks and feels like to operate in a new way.
I wanted to share this because I know how easy it is to tie your sense of worth to how much you’re earning. But real transformation isn’t just about the external results—it’s about the internal shifts that allow you to show up differently.
Building a life-first business doesn’t happen overnight. It’s messy. It’s layered. But it’s work worth doing if you want to live authentically.
Does this resonate? Would love to hear your thoughts on this.
